Autism, Family, Uncategorized

Ghost Writer

Hi. Ahem. Hello.

You can’t tell but I’m blowing dust from my laptop and awkwardly smiling like I have a guilty secret to tell. I don’t. I don’t think? Maybe we’ll find out.

But first thing’s first – I hope you’re OK. I hope you are well, and I hope that if you are well, that you are coping. Life is weird right now, so it’s OK to just be surviving.

We are surviving, and we are happy. And I thank my lucky stars that we are well. Since my last post there is much to tell, but it’s been so long I’m not sure where to start. At the beginning, you say? No, no. That won’t work. It’s just not us – it’s just not autism.

So no.

I’ll start at the end.

____________________________________

Today is isolation Day 39, and today, we needed provisions.

With outings to the supermarket being our biggest thrill at the moment, we left the house as a family of 4, and we bundled in to the car. A few minutes later I pulled up in our local carpark and gave Lloyd my verbal shopping list, before watching him disappear inside, armed with latex gloves and a bottle of hand sanitiser. How times have changed since my last post.

How times have changed.

As the three of us sat in the car waiting for Lloyd to return, Sawyer announced that he had checked ‘his Autism Stories website’ and noticed that there were no recent posts. For a fleeting moment, anxiety washed over me. It’s good at that. I brushed it away as I reached for my morals, reminding myself that I have always been very careful about personal details, and that I always said I would remove any content that Sawyer was not comfortable with, if he ever decided that was how he felt.

Sawyer is now almost 10 years old, and he absolutely should make his own decisions surrounding what is published about him online. And so, ready for any response, I turned around in my seat and asked him with a smile: “Would you rather I didn’t write about you online? Because that’s fine too.”

And I paused. Waiting. Uncomfortable. Wondering if the stories I had written, despite the sensitivity I had given them, had caused, or might cause him harm.

“Are you kidding?!” he screeched. “I LOVE IT!”.

I can’t tell you how much better Sawyer makes my life. And even though each day can be a challenge, especially at the moment, the way understands how other people may benefit from hearing his stories warms my heart. Sawyer has always been my inspiration, and I’m thrilled that he’s old enough now to help me edit the stories we share.

Because that’s what this blog will be from now on. Everything I post will be a collaboration.

Co-written and edited by my number one fan.

 

To be continued.

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